Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
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If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
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The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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