at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official drugs can't kill me
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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