To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize