Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize