She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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