Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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