yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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