i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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