After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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