i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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