Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize