Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize