fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize