i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
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I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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