Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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