FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize