I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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