I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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