I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
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her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
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Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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