i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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