Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
i need some magic done to my vagina
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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