Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  I will die if light touches me.

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  (206): I will die if light touches me. http://tfl.nu/jner
  Replies (18) Good night (1137) Bad night (552) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?

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  (805): Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself? http://tfl.nu/fcpr
  Replies (19) Good night (907) Bad night (2594) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson

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  (570): I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson http://tfl.nu/24on
  Replies (72) Good night (1119) Bad night (3580) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.

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  (773): It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out. http://tfl.nu/p4fr
  Replies (16) Good night (5097) Bad night (641) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...

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  (239): Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot... http://tfl.nu/oqxd
  Replies (17) Good night (8106) Bad night (1151) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.

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  (732): I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it. http://tfl.nu/c1o6
  Replies (5) Good night (2831) Bad night (1912) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.

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  (307): I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen. http://tfl.nu/qqp8
  Replies (8) Good night (3596) Bad night (1336) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me

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  (617): She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me http://tfl.nu/0bof
  Replies (4) Good night (1290) Bad night (3132) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical

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  (360): i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical http://tfl.nu/7e1z
  Replies (7) Good night (4126) Bad night (702)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.

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  (713): I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells. http://tfl.nu/5vl5
  Replies (10) Good night (1895) Bad night (760)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.

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  (615): I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause. http://tfl.nu/2yit
  Replies (8) Good night (1450) Bad night (679) Order T-Shirt
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.

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  (971): Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica. http://tfl.nu/ptav
  Replies (3) Good night (938) Bad night (232) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me

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  (360): it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me http://tfl.nu/wv06
  Replies (1) Good night (149) Bad night (290) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.

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  (401): i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher. http://tfl.nu/v6bw
  Replies (2) Good night (630) Bad night (168)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.

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  (201): If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses. http://tfl.nu/91v1
  Replies (0) Good night (372) Bad night (119) Order T-Shirt

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