we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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