two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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