Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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