new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
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You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
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I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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