i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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