i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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