Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
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My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
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After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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