Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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