I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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