What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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