the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize