Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize