Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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