That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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