let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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