Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
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