those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize