we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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