Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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