oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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