I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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