I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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