She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
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