I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
The best revenge is premature balding
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize