Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize