Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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