Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
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I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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