I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize